Welcome back.

If you’ve stuck by me through my blogs here on A Bergkamp Wonderland, you likely know that they typically follow a bit of a formula: feature a title that seemingly has nothing to do with Arsenal, start the blog with a personal anecdote, tie it into a seemingly arbitrary footballing concept, connect both anecdote and concept to the Arsenal, and finish by (hopefully) making you feel good about being a Gooner.

With that in mind, I will not typically write match previews or reports, transfer news, or statistical pieces. That’s not to say that I won’t touch on those subjects, but there are some great bloggers out there tackling all of these subjects far more proficiently than anything I can produce.… More SMRTETA

What’s the value of beer?

With one simple question, I’ve managed to summarize my entire University experience. My degree was in economics but most certainly my major was in beer. Friends from my University days tell me I had a good time and I’m inclined to believe them since my memory of that period is…well…it’s about as good as a dodgy Eboue challenge in the 102nd minute.

Every now and then though, out of the ethereal mists of remembrance, I have a vague recollection of debaucherous pub crawls: dressed like Spengler from Ghostbusters, trudging from pub to tiny pub with similarly attired fancy-dress friends, completely shattered drunk, and looking to meet my very own Dana Barrett; or steal something.… More SMRTETA

Have you ever been recruited?

I’m not necessarily talking about football. It could be anything: sports teams, a job, a specific university, the chess club… have you ever had someone attempt to court you for a talent you hold?

Actually don’t answer that. I really don’t want to know about your late night antics in a Welsh bar while trying to woo some member of the opposite sex.

Recently, I’ve had the opportunity to sit in on some recruitment meetings. My son (not the five year-old if you’re keeping track), happens to be pretty good at baseball. You just rolled your eyes didn’t you?… More SMRTETA

When I was in elementary school we used to get herded into the gym on occasion to be taught how to dance. It would typically be without any type of advanced warning (as anti-dance fever would strike us all on a predetermined dance day) and did not involve any type of dances recognizable from the previous half century. There was no “Lock & Pop,” “Moonwalking,” or even “Mr. Roboto.”

Mercifully, touching was completely minimized with your dance partner. There is nothing quite as awkward as being 10 years old and having to grip a member of the opposite sex for an hour while you learn to waltz.… More SMRTETA

What would you do to win?

Anything within the rules of the game? Anything within the rules of society? What about just plain anything?

What would be right and what would be wrong? Are there morals in football and in particular, at Arsenal?

There is a legal concept used in Criminal Law in the United States called – Moral Turpitude. It’s a strange term, one in which we can only guess at its inherent meaning by the use of the word “moral.” In fact, digging around on the inter-web will cough up West Encyclopedia of American Law’s description of; “conduct that is considered contrary to community standards of justice, honesty or good morals.”

Good morals may seem nebulous at first glimpse, but a bit of elbow grease and spit will uncover that in fact, there are several sets of reasonable moral rules to be found if one dares to search.… More SMRTETA